Why I'm learning to take some stuff for granted... On purpose!

Prosperity = shift in perspective to expectation plus action.

     Umm, sometimes this isn't a fact I get excited about. I do a lot of reading in the self-help genre and "the secret is to just think positive" stuff can feel a little overused no matter how true it really is. My dissatisfaction with the concept is probably because of those times I'm experiencing lack. I mean, if all I have to do is think about what I want or need, I wouldn't be still empty handed, right? It drives me nuts when people only talk about the thought part and fail to mention that action is just as important to manifest our desires. I had a personal realization though, that came with a grown-up responsibility check this weekend. 

     My partner and I were really excited at getting some Christmas money from his father. We immediately started brainstorming all the things we could do with the unexpected sum and had almost settled on indulging in a new PlayStation 4 for the family. We hesitated because we're rarely impulsive about such a big expense. Lucky we did because out of the blue on Saturday, our furnace stopped working. Bye-bye PlayStation 4. You know you're a grown-up when you spend your gaming money on a home repair. Such is the joy of home ownership. #firstworldproblems LOL!

     It got cold in the house really fast and I'd already spent all afternoon trying to get some un-split wood to burn in the fireplace. A service was called and because it was off hours, the fee was considerable. Turns out it was a simple repair, so an hour and $365 later, we were warm again. We sucked it up and reminded ourselves of all the people that aren't and it made us feel better and grateful. We were fortunate that the extra money was there when we needed it... but it got me thinking about the difference between finding extra money for things and how, when it counts, we often seem to get lucky.
    
     We have a standard of living. We are accustomed to having heat. We are even accustomed to having take out up to a couple times a week. This isn't because we're rich, it's because we accept that standard as what we want and what we expect for ourselves. It seems that even as our income has fluctuated, no matter what happens, we find a way to maintain our expectations.

     What if we were to take that same expectation and make it bigger? What if we believed just as matter-of-factly that we'd have the resources for all of the things we desire? Our eyes open up, our intuitive antennae become attuned to energy of what we want, and we begin to see opportunities and resources that we never saw before. You know how it is when you suddenly see your dream car everywhere without consciously looking for it? It's kinda like that!

     This will sound trivial, but when I just trust that the money is there for Chinese food once a week, it is. Whether that happens because extra work hours open up, a gift, or I happen to find a coupon, is completely up to whatever opportunity I act upon. The light bulb went off for me finally about the Law of Attraction and how it actually IS at work in my life in a way I never noticed before because it seemed so small.

     I'd challenge you to consider the status of your mind-set about abundance as it is right now, as well. When you consider your level of prosperity and how you currently function. How does it look? Maybe you're not that well off but have just enough. Maybe you realize that you are always able to meet your needs, it's just those "extra" desires and a level of added security that you feel there just isn't quite enough yet to reach.

     Of course there is always room for gratitude for what I do have and I firmly believe that is an essential part of the equation too. However, this is about a pattern in my life where expectations have consistently delivered results. When I have expected an outcome, I live up to that expectation- good and bad- often without even realizing how it came to be. One crucial point: when the opportunities appear, I must be willing to act on them. That's where the magic happens. There seems to be a strange, contrary-to-how-I-was-raised concept of having gratitude for what I can take for granted here that will take practice to wrap my brain around fully. So I guess it's time I up the ante to Chinese food once a week AND an annual trip to Europe, seriously.   

Why worry now? part 2

    



"Two Arches"

Now that you've determined that you are a Survivor, you've decided you are more interested in living well than quitting the game altogether through apathy, we're ready to strategize a little.

     Be realistic about the task you face but also know that it's been done before. If you have any social interaction at all, start noticing the voices of those around you that speak of positive things. When we're down it's easy to dismiss their happy, hopeful missives with that little twinge of contempt. Consider, especially, those people you know have struggled and suffered yet, despite their pain, continue to talk of gratitude for all they have. Don't be afraid to ask them what made the difference for them. There will always be someone who has overcome bigger obstacles than you. Aligning your energy with others of a like-minded path will not only reaffirm success in your mind but will also bolster your reserve for those rough days. You don't have to be a socially active person to still benefit in this way. I am an introvert. Before I found myself participating in a group in my community, I read about other peoples' stories, watched films, joined online newsletters... I virtually and spiritually connected to the collective consciousness of people who were exhibiting that state of being I wanted for myself. When I was ready, the right souls for me came into my awareness... then I said yes to their alliance.

     Choosing to grow entails acknowledging your assets and looking for solutions. You'll have to look at yourself honestly and with love, not criticism, and start deciding what of yourself you'll keep and what you'll shed. Keep it real, though. You can be idealistic and think about what your state of perfection looks like but that's more like the lifelong pursuit that you'll forever work toward. This is about becoming better than just functional and on a path to peaceful and purposeful living. Start with smaller attainable goals. Shed those things that encourage or enable the traits you aren't proud of. Get rid of that which only serves to keep you in self-abusive patterns or reliving painful events.

     Think about those little things you really like about yourself. Keep in mind that some of those traits may have seemed less desirable in the context of past relationships because the other person didn't like them. That doesn't mean that it's not a valuable part of who you are. The right people may celebrate the very same trait in you and the best part: you're not pretending to be something else. Ex: I have friends who have vast and incredible imaginations. They've been in relationships where they were rebuked for having their heads in the clouds, impractical, or even simply weird. No one was truly happy, the relationships ended anyway, and those of us that truly love them are continually amazed and inspired by their gift. Quit trying to convince others of your specialness and judging yourself by their response. I promise you that the right ones know you're special inherently.  Do tackle things like tardiness, sloppiness, dishonesty to yourself and others, and other unhealthy habits that don't convey a love and respect for yourself and your environment.

     When you start removing stuff, you'll end up with voids that so often are just refilled with other bad habits; like a former smoker who trades cigarettes for junk food. Be prepared with a plan. Fill them instead with new and positive ones. Fill them with gratitude and small victories that come with time; even if it's as simple as another minute survived. Any of us who have ever been that low know that there are times when another minute seems impossible. This time will be different. This time, for every moment you break down and cry, you're going to spend another one doing something to lift yourself back up.